I grew up in my parents' pub in England, where there was always a lot of drama. And all the drama—fights, flirting, tears, tantrums—revolved around love. I also watched my parents destroy their own love for each other. Since that time I've been on a mission to figure out exactly what love is. My mother [...]
So love is illogical, random and mysterious, yes? Not any more. We have cracked the code. In the last few years social scientists and therapists who practice emotionally focused therapy (or EFT) have made a breakthrough. Now, at the beginning of the 21st century, we have a map to this passion, this fever that has [...]
Sex often draws us into a relationship and then helps keep it alive. But what is "good" sex? If you look at the images that bombard us every day from magazines and movies, good sex is instantaneous, totally mutual, cataclysmic, and is best at the very beginning of a relationship. In fact, surveys tell us [...]
I am sitting in a restaurant shamelessly eavesdropping on a conversation at the next table. "People who expect all this woo woo stuff -- love and closeness in marriage -- are out of their minds," declares an elegantly dressed woman to her friend. "If you're lucky in love, you get a reasonable roommate and [...]
Unhappy couples always tell me that they fight over money, the kids, or sex. They tell me that they cannot communicate and the solution is that their partner has to change. "If Mary would just not get so emotional and listen to my arguments about our fiancés and the kids, we would get somewhere," Brian [...]
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